NOCTI Guide

She Said 'Stop' Mid-Massage. Prosecutors Say He Didn't. Know Your Rights

Michigan prosecutors say a massage therapist ignored a client's "stop." Here's the rulebook every therapist signed, and your 5-step plan for the table.

November 1, 2026 · Updated November 1, 2026 at 12:01 PM PST · 5 min read

Man with a white towel at the waist and arms crossed in a bright, professional massage studio, on a NOCTI Your Rights cover

The Safest Word in Any Spa Is "Stop"

Picture the most boring massage of your life. Soft music. Warm table. A towel tucked around you like a burrito. The most exciting thing in the room is the eucalyptus. That is exactly how a professional massage should feel. Boring in the best possible way. Now picture saying one word, "stop," and having it ignored. That is what prosecutors in Oakland County, Michigan, say happened to a woman during a massage at a Rochester Hills spa on Aug. 12. On Oct. 30, the Oakland County Prosecutor's Office announced a charge against Nathan Adam Thornsberry, 44, of North Branch, the massage therapist accused in the case, according to Mid-Michigan NOW and WDIV ClickOnDetroit. A charge is an accusation, not a conviction. He is presumed innocent unless proven guilty in court. But the details prosecutors released are a gut check for anyone who has ever climbed onto a massage table.

The Part Where We Put the Jokes Away

According to the prosecutor's office, the woman was mid-session when the therapist allegedly touched her intimately without her consent and sexually assaulted her. She told him to stop. Prosecutors say he kept going for a moment as he pulled his hand away. He faces one count of third-degree criminal sexual conduct, which carries up to 15 years in prison if he is convicted, Mid-Michigan NOW reported. WDIV reported that the prosecutor's office did not name the spa. Oakland County Prosecutor Karen McDonald put the standard in one line: "Massage and other therapeutic treatments are professional services." She added that customers have a right to expect professional treatment, and that the defendant is accused of abusing a position of trust. That first sentence should be framed and hung in every spa lobby in America.

"But I'm a Guy. This Isn't My Problem." Sit Down, Sir

Here's where a lot of men quietly scroll away. The client in this case is a woman, so it's easy to file this under someone else's news. Don't. Men book massages for knotted traps, marathon calves and that desk-job neck that cracks like bubble wrap. And some men, when a session drifts somewhere it shouldn't, freeze, second-guess themselves and decide it was "probably nothing." Nobody wants to seem dramatic. Some guys worry nobody will take a man's "no" seriously. So let's be clear. A professional massage runs on the same rules no matter who is on the table. Your gender, your body, your orientation and how big you tipped last time change exactly none of them.

“Your body, your rules. That includes the massage table.” — NOCTI

The Rulebook Your Therapist Already Signed

Good news: you don't have to invent your own boundaries. The profession already wrote them down. The code of ethics from the National Certification Board for Therapeutic Massage & Bodywork tells certified therapists to provide draping and treatment that protect a client's safety, comfort and privacy. It says therapists must never take part in sexual conduct with a client. And it spells out that a therapist must "respect the client's right to refuse, modify or terminate treatment regardless of prior consent given." Translated from ethics-speak: you can change your mind at any minute. "Lighter pressure." "Skip my glutes." "We're done for today." All valid. All final. No explanation required. In California, many massage professionals hold certification from the California Massage Therapy Council, known as CAMTC, which offers a public tool to verify a certificate. In Nevada, massage therapists are licensed by the Nevada State Board of Massage Therapy.

NOCTI's take: "Stop" Is a Full Sentence, Not a Suggestion

A massage is one of the few times a grown man voluntarily lies down, half-dressed, and hands his body to a near-stranger. That only works on trust. Every therapist who honors it makes the whole industry better. Every one accused of breaking it makes the rest of us flinch at the front desk. We love massage. That's exactly why we have zero patience for anyone who treats a treatment room like a loophole. And to anyone who has ever been told they "should have said something sooner": the rulebook says you can say it whenever you need to. Late is still valid.

Your 5-Step Game Plan: Before, During and After the Table

The lesson isn't "never book a massage." It's "book like you mean it." Here's how. 1. Verify before you book. In California, check the therapist's CAMTC certificate. In Nevada, check with the state massage board. Anywhere else, search your state's massage licensing board. A real pro will never be offended that you looked. 2. Say your terms out loud. Before you lie down, tell the therapist your focus areas and anything that's off-limits. Proper draping keeps you covered except for the area being worked on. 3. Use the word. If anything feels wrong, say "stop," sit up and hold the sheet. You don't owe anyone a reason or the rest of the hour. 4. Leave and write it down. Get dressed, walk out, and note the date, time, therapist's name and exactly what happened while it's fresh. 5. Report it. Call police about any sexual contact you didn't agree to. In California you can also email a written complaint to CAMTC, which asks for your name, the professional's name, details of what happened and whether you filed a police report. CAMTC says it does not investigate anonymous complaints. And RAINN's National Sexual Assault Hotline, 800-656-HOPE, is free, confidential and open 24/7 to survivors of any gender.

The Bottom Line

The best massage is the one where the only surprise is how good your shoulders feel afterward. Ready to find men's care that puts professionalism first? Start exploring at joinnocti.com/discover.

SourcesMid-Michigan NOW, WDIV ClickOnDetroit +4 more

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